Wednesday, August 17, 2011

About your middle name

We decided to give our little boy the middle name "Lawrence." He's named after my father-in-law, who passed away back in 2006 only two months after my wife and I were married. He was a really strong man, tougher than almost anyone I've ever met and had more fight in his left pinkie than I have in my whole body.

Cancer took him far too young, but here's a testament on how tough Larry was: it took cancer five tries to finally overtake him. Larry beat it back over and over again. Tough.

When we were talking about names should our baby turn out to be a boy, we both seemed pretty convinced that we wanted to honor Grandpa White. I didn't get nearly the chance to know my father-in-law as I would have liked, but of what I do know I see a lot of his spirit in Austin. It's sad to me that Grandpa won't get to hold his grandson and beam with pride over his first grandchild, but we didn't name Austin so we could be sad. To me it's a reminder that we, when we do it right, pass on the best of ourselves to future generations.

Yesterday was Grandpa's birthday. Grandma told Austin about him during the day, and last night I told Austin the story about how I asked for permission to marry his daughter. I'm sure that over the years he will hear more stories. His Grandpa was quite a character, but the kind of character you want to get to know.

It's been interesting watching how our baby boy's birth has had an effect on the family. There was so much sadness early on in our marriage, lots of kicks to the gut that aren't supposed to come with such a happy time. For a while it seemed relentless. We got through it because that's what we do, me and my wife. We get through things. But the sadness has lingered on and off, waxing and waning in moments as timed moved on.

You don't really ever get over things that sad. But our son's birth has been a nice bookend on that chapter of life. A new life will do that for your perspective. It doesn't heal the wounds, but it seems to be granting that one thing that's been missing for a long time: hope.


Post #63 in my 90-in-90 blog challenge. Blog with us and join the fun. I'll be blogging both here and on my professional blog for the challenge. For more about the 90/90 challenge, read about my call for participants. The blogs participating are on the list at the right, or follow us on the #LUBlogTribe hashtag on Twitter


  1. This is a beautiful tribute. Not kidding, it made me cry. You are wonderful parents already to be honoring those you love and teaching your son about them. All the best to you and your family!